Are You In a Fantasy Relationship?
Are you in a fantasy relationship? Thousands of people today are in fantasy relationships and don't even know it.
Here's one clue: your relationship happens ONLY on the phone (or Skype or email). It never takes place in person.
Or... your relationship starts out in person, but ends up being a "phone only" relationship.
That goes for relationships that are only conducted via text or Skype or anything else that is NOT IN PERSON.
You've seen this show "Catfish"? Now that show is a public service to mankind. Very well done and unlike a lot of other shows, it doesn't disrespect the very people it's using for the story. (I hate to see people humiliated on tv or anywhere else.)
The thing about "Catfish" is that many of these people (the ones who are being duped) are NOT anxious to meet in person. Perhaps deep down they KNOW it's a fantasy relationship and they want to postpone the bursting of their bubble.
But the fact is, if you're having a relationship that is NOT in person; that's mostly taking place on the phone or online, then you're not having a real relationship.
"Oh, but he lives overseas." Really? Now what in the Sam Hill do you have in mind for your future?
Is one of you definitely planning to relocate, and soon?
If not, then wouldn't you be doing yourself FAR more good to meet people in your area, or in an area where you're willing to relocate?
But you know... there are certain times in life when what I'm calling a "fantasy relationship" can be better than no relationship, because having some form of a love life can be the juice that motivates us and makes us feel happy.
It's certainly not the only way to be happy, but it's one way.
If you want to go ahead and have a fantasy relationship, then there's nothing wrong with that, but why not admit to yourself that this is what it is - and that maybe you really don't want a real future in the flesh with this person.
And that's okay too. But if you DO want to really be married to someone, then start moving away from any fantasy relationships and start meeting people in your community OR, if your community is man-less, then consider a move to somewhere else.
Ultimately, we owe it to ourselves to be true to what we REALLY want, whatever that is. We owe it to ourselves to be privately honest about what we're doing, what we want, and what we're really willing to do - or not do!
There are no wrong answers here. But we owe it to ourselves to be clear on what we're doing with our lives.